I get a lot of raised eyebrows when I say that: Most people think of selfdemolition as fear of success. But deep down, despair over achievements isn’t truly a fear of ambition and your own worth—it’s a fear of trying one’s best and not succeeding, of being personally let down and publicly humiliated as we worry that our best just might not be good enough ~ Ellen Hendrickson
Exercise - Which Source of Self-Sabotage Is Highest Risk?
14 Common Forms of Self Sabotage
Overwork & Under Recovery
Catastrophizing
Self-Limiting Beliefs
Impatience & Dismissing Incremental Gains
Failure to Acknowledge Regression to the Mean
Seeking Safety & Familiarity
The Fear of Outshining
Misattributed Causality
Requiring Novel Information to Act
Reasoning by Analogy Versus from First Principles
Believing That Success Brings a Bigger Burden
Feeling Fundamentally Flawed
Skewed CS Ratio
Loss of Self Control
Awareness Alone Is Curative
Ask yourself: Am I susceptible to this? Being aware of the pattern can help you intercept and break it.
Which Source of Self-Sabotage Is Your Highest Risk?
Your notes
Glossary
Self-Sabotage: Behavior is said to be self-sabotaging when it creates problems in daily life that interfere with long-standing goals. Common examples include procrastination, self-medication with drugs or alcohol, comfort eating, overworking, self-destructive relational engagements.
Familiarity: Choosing consistency over happiness.
Self Limiting Beliefs: Thinking small and robbing yourself of all the actions necessary to achieve big things.
Impatience & Dismissal of Exponential Gains: Insistence on results NOW, failure to understand the compound effect and cause and effect.
The Fear of Outshining: Playing small to avoid exposing the failure and mediocrity of others.
Tall Poppy Syndrome: Describes a social phenomenon in which people of genuine merit are resented, attacked, cut down, or criticized because of their talents or achievements that elevate them above or distinguish them from their peers.
The Crime of Outshining: You believe that if you become too successful you will make others look bad.
Misattributed Causality: Failing to see that X produces Y. Instead of believing that A produces Y. Continuing to do A, falsely believing that it produces Y.
Requiring Novel Information to Act: Insisting that information or advice is “new” in order to take it seriously and apply it.
Reasoning by Analogy: Accepting reality as it’s societally presented to you, versus asking “WHY?!” to peel back the layers of social conditioning and see things as they actually are for yourself.
Believing Success Brings a Burden: Destructive, subconscious assumptions that if you’re successful, other problems will arise in your life that you don’t want.
The Upper Limit Problem: The Upper Limit Problem is our universal human tendency to sabotage ourselves when we have exceeded the artificial upper limit we have placed on ourselves.
Identify Your “Upper Limits” — What GOOD things cause you to “squirm” and begin to feel discomfort?
Catch Yourself Bashing Your Head Against Your “Upper Limits” — The next time one of these GOOD things happen, catch the feeling of discomfort.
Intercept the Feeling Before It Leads to Action — Breathe, feel the feeling, think about what self-destructive tendencies you’re now inclined towards, then DON’T do them. Engage positively instead.
Carry on with a Positive Action — Having caught the feeling, intercepted the cycle and thus broken the pattern you can now continue with an action that will move you forward.
The more mindful, calm, present, nourished, well-slept, un-rushed you are the easier this interception becomes.
Breaking Ruts!
Unlock the Watchtower Effect with a Peak State — Flow, awe, trance, mediation.
Dopamine Detox — Strip away all stimulation.
Burnout Assessment — Assess susceptibility to the burnout triggers.
Positive Psychology Basics Assessment — Ensure you’re doing all of the PP basics.
Intrinsic Motivational Stack Assessment — Assess your motivational fuel. Pattern
Interrupt — Schedule a big pattern interrupt; arousing if underaroused, calming if over aroused.
Find a Bigger Problem — Break the rut by going bigger.